All the Quotes
Below are all the quotes that are randomly selected for usage in the Quote of the Day portion of the sidebar. I’ve provided this section of the site based on popular demand to be able to see all of the quotes. Here they are; enjoy!
Charlie Rich - I really don’t like happy music. I don’t really think it says anything.
Dr. Rodney McKay - Just once I would like to get taken captive by the sexy alien.
Bandits - There are guys who leave, and there are guys who get left. I don’t think it’s any mystery which category I fit into.
Ichiro Irie - I have been interested in women’s feet.
COMON$ (Source) - You have to know what happiness is before you can buy it.
Gloria Poenig - People don’t realize that every time a Burger King closes, a little piece of America dies.
Tim Blair - Australian culture isn’t yours to control, film boy. Now get me my popcorn and shut up.
Nick Bogardus - …it does get frustrating reading The Grand Statements of The Profoundly Retarded for the thousandth time.
Fall Out Boy - “Get Busy Living or Get Busy Dying” - Why put a new address on the same old loneliness?
Strong Bad - A one that isn’t cold is scarcely a one at all.
Jack’s Mannequin - “Dark Blue” - Have you ever been alone in a crowded room?
Lileks - They didn’t come to this level of stupidity naturally. They had to work at it.
James Lileks - This was a State Fair Gopher, and I regard them the same way some cultures would regard an albino oxen: special creatures who must be revered.
Dom - And yet, with all these games going “Hey! Play me!”, what do I fire up? Minesweeper. I don’t get it. Every few minutes I have free, I play Minesweeper. I can’t explain it.
Masamichi - What happened to the days where ‘go play in the mech’ could keep them happy for hours?
Largo (MegaTokyo) - Betrayal is the deepest wound of all.
The Dane - Really, I think Hellboy embracing a flaming girl as if they were actually made for each other is one of the loveliest images I’ve seen lately.
The Dane - I learned not to fear the opinions and beliefs of others but to recognize them as honest, heartfelt, different, to be respected, and wrong.
The Dane - Sub-par spelling isn’t just a besmirching, it’s a way of life.
White Mage - Chaos is not some elected official.
John Adams - Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passion, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.
Robert Wilensky - We’ve heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the complete works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know that is not true.
Rich Dad, Poor Dad - There’s a difference between being poor and being broke. Broke is temporary, and poor is eternal.
Jason Wall - No society has ever been great when its citizens hold selfishness above real love.
Hope is Emo: Chapter 01 - Just because I’m introspective and I walk among the shadows doesn’t mean that I can’t hear you.
a Nicaraguan boy - The most beautiful thing we can do is struggle.
Albert Einstein - … the man who regards his own life and that of his fellow creatures as meaningless is not merely unfortunate but almost disqualified for life.
Amy Hatcher - And I’m running out of spit.
Andrew Jordan (Matchbook Romance) - …I feel like it’s better to pay off your debt to somebody by not telling them and just totally facing it by yourself… And the other person freaks out and cries and gets f—ed-up permanently over one of your mistakes. Then they’re always looking over their shoulders.
I’ll never do that again to anybody else, ever. That’s more of a punishment than anything because secrets eat you alive and haunt you. Those people wind up hiding in the back of your head forever, like voices.
Andrew Salyer - I would argue that, to an extent, everyone at one point or another looks deep into the weight of a single, seemingly empty moment and finds something horriffically true. (Context)
Andy Hurley (Fall Out Boy) - Things were way more fun [when we were unknown] because it was more dangerous. You didn’t know if you had a place to sleep. Now the only decision we have to make is which pool of money to sleep in. And that’s not really that fun.
Anthony Swofford - “Jarhead” - It took years for you to understand that the most complex and dangerous conflicts, the most harrowing operations, and the most deadly wars, occur in the head.
Augustus Massalee (Source) - “My thugs, they know about life, because they were in the struggle, too.”
B. Levering - You gotta get up, slaughter the lamb, and splatter the blood or you’re hosed.
Ben Casnocha - One of my life principles is to expose myself to as much randomness as possible.
Ben Metevier - I don’t think you should eat things that make you want to die.
Ben Metevier - I never want to be in a wheelchair because someone will feed me to pigs.
Benjamin Franklin - Three may keep a secret if Two of them are dead.
Beracah - People like me are usually women.
Bill Clinton - Benjamin Franklin told our constitutional convention ‘the first man put at the helm will be a good one, but no one knows what sort will come afterward.’
Bill Maher - Arnold Schwarzenegger: Finally, a public official who can explain the administration’s social policies in the original German.
Bob Dylan - Happiness is not on my list of priorities. I just deal with day-to-day things. If I’m happy, I’m
happy–and if I’m not, I don’t know the difference…
Knowing that you are the person you were put on this earth to be–that’s much more important than just being happy.
C.S. Lewis — The Great Divorce - For to be afraid of oneself is the last horror.
Cal - I wanna go back in time and smack myself around.
Cal - Man, I had a really unorthodox thought today.
Cal - Talk to me about anything you want so long as you’ll stop lying to yourself first.
Cal - I can’t empathize that much, I’m on a freaking telephone.
Cal - I can complain all I want on the internets and even if nobody hears my cries, at least Google reads them.
Cal (referring to a glacier landscape photo) - This would make better wallpaper than my face.
Carl Jung - Neurosis is always a substitute for legitimate suffering.
Carl Jung - Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol, morphine or idealism.
Chinese proverb - A single spark can start a prairie fire.
Cora - If you like someone enough, you’re willing to put up with their bacteria.
Cora - If it’s funny you should be able to look at me and laugh.
Cora - You don’t buy girls stuff because they love you, you buy girls stuff because you want them to love you.
Cora - Oh my gosh, I want a skunk.
Cora - If people don’t think like me they shouldn’t be hiring other people.
Cora - I wasn’t aware that anything existed before the internet.
Cora - Hicks aren’t good reasons.
Cora - The name of the love game is to scar more people than scar you.
Cora - My sanity is 80%, which is almost passing.
Cora - I have a midget cat.
Cora (at Wendy’s) - I’m not so much grossed out as I am unamused.
D. Patras - That’s a terrible joke. I’m ashamed.
D. Patras - I buy cheap purses, too.
D. Patras - His mind was so jacked up; after that, he probably became a porn star.
Danut Manastireanu - There is no greater enemy of peace than ignorance. If they will dare to meet and talk, they will be surprised to discover that they have more in common than what divides them.
Daphne Loves Derby - Memories of love will be the only warmth we have in the end.
Donald Miller - You never question the truth of something until you have to explain it to a skeptic.
Doris Lessing - I can’t say I’m overwhelmed with surprise. I’m 88 years old and they can’t give the Nobel to someone who’s dead, so I think they were probably thinking they’d probably better give it to me now before I’ve popped off.
Douglas Adams - I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
Douglas Adams - “The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul” - It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on earth has ever produced the expression ‘pretty as an airport.’ Airports are ugly. Some are very ugly. Some attain a degree of ugliness that can only be the result of a special effort.
Dr. Cox (Scrubs) - Lady, people aren’t chocolates. D’you know what they are mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling. But I don’t find them half as annoying as I find naive bobble-headed optimists who walk around vomiting sunshine.
Dropkick Murphys - Wicked Sensitive Crew - Well it’s all gone to hell now, the wimps have gangs.
E.M. Forster - “Howards End” - All men are equal — all men, that is to say, who possess umbrellas.
Eisley - With light bulbs in our pockets
we light the darkened forest.
Erika - Religion can be a social sedative.
Erika - I can’t imagine you flirting.
Fall Out Boy - Spent most of last night dragging this lake for the corpses of all my past mistakes.
George Costanza (from Seinfeld) - I told her I liked her. Why? Why did I tell her I like her? I have this sick compulsion to tell women how I feel.
Helen Keller - The marvelous richness of human experience would lose something of rewarding joy if there were no limitations to overcome.
Isaac - Perfection is my only flaw.
Isaac - Girls don’t really want creative guys, they want psychics.
J. I. Packer - A sense of one’s need of God’s instruction is the best possible frame of mind for Bible study.
J.K. Rowling - “Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone” - There are some things you can’t share without ending up liking each other, and knocking out a twelve-foot mountain troll is one of them.
Jake - I bought them clean out of Dr. Pepper. Yessirree, all three cans.
Jake - I wish I had cud to chew sometimes.
Jakob Ostergaard - Intellectual Property, like flying pigs, cannot be found in nature.
Jean Louis R. Agassiz - Facts are stupid things until brought into connection with some general law.
Jenna Bush - He’s not the shotgun-dad type, he’s the ‘joking around to the point where he scares the heck out of them’ type.
Jenny - I’ve said many things that are quotable tonight… and that was not one of them!
Jesse Luebbe - This is definitely a closet for bodies.
Jesse Luebbe - My purity today has been compromised by a naked orange.
Jesse Luebbe - If it didn’t stop the pain, it would when it killed me.
Jesse Luebbe - I don’t know if I’ve ever experienced that, but it makes me afraid to kiss you.
Jesse Luebbe - I regret not having the chance in my childhood to beat the complete shit out of someone.
Jesse Luebbe - I can bathe in a jet.
Jesse Luebbe - You’re retarded, but you’re not special.
Jesse Luebbe - You’re priceless; I should flirt with you.
Jesse Luebbe - If you really cared about me, you’d have me committed.
Jesse Luebbe - That was my life dream - to be a case study.
Jesse Luebbe - I really like being physical. That’s why I liked being an athlete. In a way I still am. I am highly trained - at whatever it is I do.
Joel Hodgson - When we write our jokes, we don’t ask ourselves, ‘Will anyone get this?’ we say to ourselves, ‘The right people will get this.’
John Eldredge - For after years of living in a cage, a lion no longer even believes it is a lion . . . and a man no longer believes he is a man.
John Eldredge - Most of what you encounter when you meet a man is a facade, an elaborate fig leaf, a brilliant disguise.
John Piper - Our chief enemy is the lie that says sin will make our future happier. Our chief weapon is the Truth that says God will make our future happier. And faith is the victory that overcomes the lie, because faith is satisfied with God.
Jon Foreman - You realize how poor we are as Americans. We might have a nice SUV, but nothing to show for our humanity.
Jonathan Edwards - Some talk about it as an unreasonable thing to fright persons to heaven, but I think it is a reasonable thing to endeavour to fright persons away from hell. They stand upon its brink, and are just ready to fall into it, and are senseless of their danger. Is it not a reasonable thing to fright a person out of a house on fire?
Justin - I’ve been turned down before, but I haven’t been laughed at for it.
Keith Pepsny - Me and God saw a movie together one time.
Kevin - Pray for me every time you spend money.
Kevin Federline - My record… was just to get people to understand a little bit more who I am. There’s no real, like, message.
Kirk Nemechek (Source) - I have heard of chimps and orangutans that can pick locks. I’ve also heard a guy who swears his raccoon can pick a lock, but I’ve never heard of a monkey who can pick a lock.
Little Big Town - Live with Lonesome - It’s a curse and a blessing to find love above all the rest, now I’d rather have nothing than to settle for less.
M. Crawford - Austin is a good guy, he just sucks at Halo.
M. Foral - I thought the woman on the door meant laundry room.
M. Foral - This isn’t really a party; this is an intervention.
Martin - I think like a scientist; I eat like a monkey.
Martin Luther - The works of monks and priests, however holy and arduous they be, do not differ one whit in the sight of God from the works of the rustic laborer in the field or the woman going about her household tasks, but that all works are measured before God by faith alone.
Michael Yon - This may not be the war some folks had in mind a few years ago. But once the shooting starts, a plan is just a guess in a party dress. (Source)
Mike Krahulik (Penny Arcade) - I developed humor as a defense mechanism. Now I drive a f—ing Mercedes.
Missy Senf - It would’ve been much worse if I’d shot her in the face… and that was before church started.
Monty - (25th Hour) - Champagne for my real friends, and real pain for my sham friends.
Morpheus - I had a dream once, but now that dream is gone from me
Most Rev. Charles J. Chaput - Democracy depends on people of character fighting for their beliefs in the public square - legally, ethically and non-violently, but forcefully and without apology.
Motion City Soundtrack - “Feel Like Rain” - … the pain reminds us that we’re still alive.
MXPX - Do Your Feet Hurt - Do your feet hurt? Did you fall from heaven? / ‘Cause you’ve been running through / my mind all day
N. Pizzo - I’m emo — so kill me.
Nate Perez - I want to be baptized by a velociraptor.
newspaper article - There were no laws against sticking meat hooks into yourself and hanging from a tripod on a sandbar….
Oliver North - Today… support for Marxism is confined to a handful of poverty-stricken countries and certain American college professors…
Patrick Stump (Fall Out Boy) - Life is very short, and you can’t go around painting your face with zombie colors and being pissed the whole time.
Philippians 4:6-7 - Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Relient K - Apathetic Way to Be - Half of me is all about apathy, and the other half just doesn’t care.
Ronen Kauffman (Source) - I hope that all the kids out there understand that the more bands you have, the more terrible bands you have, you know? That’s just the way it is.
Rudyard Kipling - The Jungle Book - Here we go in a flung festoon, Half-way up to the jealous moon!
Senator Ortolan Finistirre (Thank You For Smoking character) - The great state of Vermont will not apologize for its cheese.
Shelly Dignum - I can’t imagine eating a tongue with my tongue. It’d be like making out with a cow.
Sirius Black (Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire) - If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.
Steve Watters - Commitment means looking past the 3 billion other women in the world and zooming in on one person — studying her, knowing her, and learning to love her deeply while she goes through the same process with you.
T. Pizzo - She has such a good heart; she doesn’t even know who Tupac was.
Thrice - “For Miles” - And as long as we live, every scar is a bridge to someone’s broken heart, and there’s no greater love than that one shed his blood for his friends.
Tracy - That is so 1997.
Tyler - You’re not retarded, but you’re damn close.
William Golding - “Thinking as a Hobby” - To find out the deficiencies of our elders bolsters the young ego but does not make for personal security.